When I was home in NY over New Year’s, I made a list of all the projects I knew I wanted to accomplish in 2014. I got out my calendar, and scheduled everything in, allotting myself however much time I thought each project would reasonably take. When I was done, I looked at my color-coded calendar with admiration. Look at how organized you are! Look at how successful you will be!
Then, when I got home, I immediately started on the first project in my queue. When it came time to decide how to quilt it, I froze. I couldn’t make a decision at all. With all kinds of fabric in my sewing area and my calendar breathing down my neck, I decided I’d put it aside and start the next project while waiting for inspiration to strike. Except, I couldn’t decide how to even piece the next project. Or the one after that. Or the one after that.
I had the worst case of quilter’s block I’ve ever had.
Simultaneous to this, we have been insanely busy with so many little life changes and occurrences in the past month. Mark started a new job, we got sick, the baby is teething, we’ve been house-hunting, etc. My free time is going to just sitting on the couch in exhaustion. Not physical exhaustion even: I’m just mentally tired. Spent.
Today I read this interesting article called 5 Scientific Secrets to High Performance. One of the first things they talk about in the article is how much energy goes into decision-making. If you’re expending energy to make many little decisions, you won’t have any left over for big ones. This is my life! I thought. The past month has been a relentless series of machine gun-style decision-making. What insurance plan do we want to choose? What houses do we want to go see? Which house did we like the best? Do we want to make an offer? What should the offer be? The list goes on and on.
So, I’ve scrapped my calendar. I wake up every day and hope that maybe today is the day that I find some untapped reservoir of energy and motivation and get started on something. Today was not that day. Maybe tomorrow will be.